Tag: flying


Oct
2015

#VivaRossVegas (Overcoming Fear)

categories: goal
thumb_thumb_IMG_3152_1024_1024
Rock of Ages Vegas knew I was coming!

I recently flew (on a plane) for the first time in many, many years. To say I don’t like to fly is an understatement. I DON’T fly. Period. I drive everywhere, including up and down the country to WI and back to see my family.

With my new job came new responsibility and one of my goals for this year (the big 4-0) was to fly again. I knew I *may* have to fly this year with the new job, but it wasn’t a given. Until they told me they were sending me to a conference (which I am VERY grateful for). Being terrified of flying and also going somewhere new, I stocked up on the Xanax (thanks, Doc!), got some breathing exercises from my therapist, and hubs dropped me off at the airport armed with a dragon and a kiss.

Let me tell ya, Xanax is WONDERFUL! I wasn’t nearly as nervous as I would have been and I was actually excited to get on the plane, headed for new land. The flight was non-stop (oh, I wasn’t taking any chances on my first foray back in the friendly skies) and it wasn’t bad at all. I hate takeoff the most – after that, I’m pretty good and landing is fun b/c I CAN SEE LAND. lol.

My first time in Las Vegas was everything I had hoped, sans the walking. I’m pretty sure I walked more during my week in Vegas than I have in any other time in my life. It was painful (plantar fasciitis), but worth it. The conference was amazing, the mountains were gorgeous, the Strip was alive, and I had some of the best food and saw the best show (twice). You can follow my adventures on Instagram under the hashtag #VivaRossVegas.

thumb_IMG_3275_1024
There are some awesome & crazy people on Fremont Street!

Now, the plane ride home was not as glorious. I came home with way more than I went with so I had to buy some extra luggage to lug all my chachkies in. In my panicked packing frenzy of trying to stuff everything into bags, I accidentally packed my Xanax into my checked bag. I didn’t realize it until I got to the airport, checked in, and went to have a bite to eat and take a pill. No pill. Don’t panic, Sherri. Just have a cocktail (or four) and call it a day. The cocktails worked a little magic until our flight was delayed over an hour because “a passenger has a medical issue and we’re going back to the gate.” Aggghh! By the time we actually took off, I was my old, neurotic, nervous self rocking back and forth in my seat with my hands holding my earbuds as far into my ears as they would go and my eyes closed tight. I really looked special. Thankfully, the sweet veterinarian sitting in my row offered up a plastic stress dog that, when you squeeze him, his eyeballs pop out. What fun for a crazy person! I squeezed that dog so hard his head nearly popped off. Takeoff was rocky (for me), the trip was ok, and I was happy once we started to descend.

All in all, a very good trip and yes, I will fly again. With Xanax. And probably other things. But hey, I reached my goal, marked that off my bucket list and my ‘To Do at 40’ list (along with walking around Vulcan), and BOOM, I lived to tell about it. All that to say, you can do anything you set your mind to. I *could* have driven to Vegas (and seriously mapped out the road trip when I was first told I was going), but I put my extra large big girl panties on, took a few deep breaths, and flew off into the sunset singing, “Viva Las Vegas.” Join me next time!

thumb_IMG_2850_1024


Jul
2015

Fear Doesn’t Take a Holiday

categories: fear

IMG_1679

I have thanatophobia. For those who don’t know it’s an insane, irrational fear of death. I know death is looming and the thought can paralyze me in an instant if I’m not careful. I’ve had hundreds of panic attacks thinking about life as I know it ending and trying to rationalize it in my head. It never works. My belief in God says it’s not supposed to, but I keep trying like an idiot.

I’ve learned to live with the fear, though I do try to talk to professionals about it if gets overwhelming. But it also means I have taken only one trip on an airplane in the last 10 years. I used to love flying, long before anxiety and fear kicked in and crippled me. I drive everywhere now – even across the country. And yes, I know that driving is more dangerous than flying, but apparently I’d rather die on the road than falling out of the sky. Thanatophobia also manifests itself into many other fears that control my days. I’m terribly skittish, nearly hitting the ground if I hear a loud bang or if someone just surprises me. I scream bloody murder, ask my husband. I once went to a shooting range and before I even got settled into a lane, I heard someone shoot and came flying out, crying. It scared me….nearly to death.

All that to say this, fear doesn’t take a holiday. Not today, on this day we celebrate the freedom afforded to us by our ancestors and those who have served and are serving to help keep us free and safe. I will hear fireworks tonight and, because I know the holiday, I will watch with child-like happiness at their beauty. I will not be afraid because I can see them and I know they are coming. But my fear is still there and it can hit at any time, even today.

I decided on January 1 of this year that I was going to work hard to take control back from fear. I was turning 40 this year and it was a perfect time to change my path. I want to travel. I want to naturally be calm and relaxed. I want to be my authentic self, not controlled by fear. To that end, I made a list to myself of a few things I was going to do this year to help me take my freedom back.

  1. “Walk This Way” The fear of heights is strong in this one and hubby challenged me last year to walk around Vulcan one time to prove to myself that I could. I tried one other time, a few years ago, and couldn’t let go of the stone wall inner core in order to move; I barely made it across the walkway from the elevator to the observation deck of Vulcan. I’m happy to report that we went by Vulcan earlier this year on a whim and I did it! It was glorious.
  2. “Big Jet Airliner” I surprised hubby when I told him earlier this year that I WAS getting on a plane to somewhere this year. Well, that somewhere happens to be Las Vegas for work in October. I’m excited because it will be my first trip to Vegas, but I’m already having panic attacks about it. “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.”
  3. “Just Like a Tattoo” I have always wanted a tattoo. ALWAYS. My mother even took me to get one when I was much younger and I chickened out because the artist said it would hurt. A few months ago, again on a whim, hubby and I decided we would get tattoos. It hurt like crazy, but I wasn’t scared for some reason. And I love it! I am so happy I finally did it.
  4. “Bootylicious” I am ENTIRELY too bootylicious, as in I have way too much booty going on, along with too much of everything else. To help with that, I started working out, discovered an awesome new fitness class I am loving, and will be finally starting yoga in the next few weeks. I’m most excited about the yoga to help me calm down, control my energy and body with learning how to breathe properly, and get stronger inside and out. I am grateful for this new adventure with Melissa Scott Yoga.
  5. “Off With Her Head, er, Hair!” I’ve gone back and forth on this for years. My hair is nice, but boy, does it make me hot (ie. SWEAT). It drives me bonkers. I’ve always wanted super short hair and have veered away from it my entire adult life. I’ve cut it short, but not nearly as short as I want. I recently cut off 11 inches to donate, also hoping it would cool me off some. That’s a negative, Ghost Rider. Inspired by some very sassy, sexy lady friends who recently shaved it all off, I’ve decided to chop some more off. No, I’m not going GI Jane – I can’t because of my job, though I wish sometimes I could just for the sheer coolness of it (literal coolness, not figurative). But I will be sporting a cut somewhere between my super crazy woman crush Lindsay and this when I get done.

This all goes back to taking MY freedom back from fear. Forty seems like the perfect age to get it together, do what I’ve always wanted, and be my authentic self. This year is MY year…in so many ways. I am blessed beyond measure and thank God everyday for that. Will this be your year, too? What will you be doing to take back your freedom from distractions or things that hold you back? What are you already doing to be your authentic self?